I've prayed. I've worried. I've fretted. I've feared. I've prayed. I've let go. I've worried. I've fretted. I've feared. I've prayed. I've let go.
Repeatedly, the last several months.
It hasn't changed a darn thing. Well, the praying has, but nothing else has really made things better, except the fact that I realize I'm in good company with the rest of the worriers, fritters and fearfuls.
We all have our beliefs and our sureness down pat. There's not much that could really change any of our minds, no matter which side we've landed on right now.
I've seen the repeated memes comparing the two candidates. I've read the reasons why one's sins are worse or not as bad as the other's sins. Ad nauseum.
Those thoughts haven't changed my thoughts. I doubt anyone's have been changed.
Setting aside the criteria of character for one running for President of the United States, what else matters in this election? That question has been answered by a host of experts too. Supreme Court appointments, health care, defense, national security, blah....blah....blah.
What else matters?
If we Followers of Jesus really want to walk our talk and talk our walk, what matters is how God views each of the candidates.
He said something awhile back, something about not looking at the outward appearance of things, but instead he looked at the heart.
We can't look inside the heart, we can see the actions but even then we only see snippets of the actions they want us to see. Whether in a good light or a bad light, nothing is as it appears on TV or in a meme or anywhere else.
Only God knows the full story. Only God knows the circumstances. Only God knows the heart's motive.
But.......(you knew that was coming),
We still have two flawed people, vulnerable and exposed to the world.
Both of them look like all of us. Whether in small ways or larger ways, all of us can relate and are guilty of at least one of the sins these two people have listed next to their names on a 24 hour news cycle.
When I think of them in this light, my heart hurts for them.
I wonder if they know and believe that Jesus still loves them.
I wonder if they know and believe that Jesus died to free them from the sin that we so mercilessly point out to them.
I wonder if they hate the reminders continually being brought up again and again and again.
I wonder if they want to scream at all of us, "Leave me alone, this is between my God and me!"
I wonder if they struggle with the voices (not just ours, but the hidden voices) that taunt them and say "Look at what you've done! How could you? You're not that bad. It could be worse. You only did what you had to."
Maybe I'm the only one who has to wrangle those kinds of thoughts.
I wonder if they are tired and weary and heavy laden.
I wonder if they wish they could push the restart button of their lives and do things differently.
I wonder if they do, what would they do differently.
We're stuck with flawed human beings, no matter which one we get, each of them is greatly flawed and both are a great reflection of the people they will be leading.
If God's grace isn't for them, it isn't for us either.
That's a hard pill to swallow.
No matter who wins, the call of the Followers of Jesus is clear. Prayer for our President is needed like never before. We want to be free from the sins that bind us so must I want them to be free of the sins that bind them, no matter who is President.
Our job is clear, come November 9th.
It won't be a time of lamenting and stewing, but a new time of ceaseless praying, if not for them, us.
I want the best for my country and my children and grandchildren.
It looks like God is in the business of using very flawed people to remind me how flawed I am without the grace and love of Jesus Christ. I pray that whoever wins, comes to know and live out that truth too.