A number of years ago when we were facing a move that we knew would have us moving again in less than six months I was new to reading the Bible. I actually wasn't even reading the Bible as a whole, I was more or less just taking a peek here and there, too afraid to look too closely for fear of what I might find it saying to me.
Even though I had been a regular church goer I had come to a place in my life where I needed to put shoe leather to what I said I believed, rather than just let someone tell me what I believed. I believed I had reached the point, to use several vernacular, "given my life to Christ, surrendered to Christ, believed Christ." I don't know what you would call it. Some are very offended by any words that reflect any action of faith on the part of a spiritually dead person, but there was something different I knew deep down I needed to do. God had wrapped the gift and was handing it to me, I had to ask him to lift my hands from my side so I could take the gift and unwrap it.
Something was happening in my life that would end up rocking the very foundation I thought I had in Christ Jesus, but it was something that was a specific action during a specific time in my life where I had to let the rubber meet the road and say either, "I will follow wherever you lead," or "I will try and manipulate and figure my life out on my own."
It was during this time period, when my circumstances for living, for my family, my children, my home was totally out of my control. We had to move and it sucked. We tried everything we could to stay where we were for just four more months but we hit a wall every time. We had to move. For four months. And then, move again.
It sucked. It really, really sucked.
But during this time, during this struggle not only of physical circumstances, it was a spiritual struggle most of all. Do I trust God enough to take care of this situation? Am I willing to trust Him even though I can only see the inconvenience, the difficulty, and the stress of the situation, will I trust Him to take care of this for me?
It was a day of choices.
His way or mine.
I'm humbled to say now, that I "choose", yes, I made the choice to follow His way, not mine, to follow Him and the reason I did, was because as I wrote above, I was just peeking in the Bible, just kind of playing with it at that time, not really wanting to take it seriously, when one day, when I was crying and praying and whining I decided to try this Bible thing and my eyes fell on this verse.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.
Trust. In the Lord.
With all my heart. Not just some of your heart, Ronda, all of it.
Don't lean on what you think you know, lean on me.
In everything you do, from here on out, try to see me in the circumstances.
And you know what I'll do, I'll make it all work out just fine.
He got me with that verse. Just that one verse. (Smile).
It's been a wild ride ever since. We moved. We moved again four months later. And a few more times after that. If I've learned one thing from my life as a Navy wife, it's this: The Navy never moved us. God did. Every time.
But He got my heart that day. He got my attention to see the attention He pays to every detail of our lives. He wanted me to live the moves and the pain of them and the sadness and sense of loss and heartache because He wanted my heart. All of it. Not just a portion, not just the part I was giving him on a Sunday morning.
He wanted all of it.
And He wants all of yours too.
Not to be mean to you or to make life less fun and sufferable, but because He knows how painful it is for us to try and figure things our for ourselves, NEEDLESSLY, when He's right there. Waiting to take you by the hand and walk with you through the crap that this world brings.
It's only one word that will change your life and your thinking and your behaviors and your beliefs.
You may think your circumstances are dictating your life, but they're really not. God has an intricate, detailed plan in motion from the minute you are first formed in your mother's womb to the last breath you take on this earth.
Trust in Him with ALL your heart. Don't trust your understanding or your logic or your rational thinking. In everything you do, get to know Him through everything, see Him in everything you do, ask Him to guide you in everything you do, and your paths, your plans, your desires will work out better than you could have ever controlled or manipulated or planned.
Trust Him. He's got you.
And boy, does He think you're awesome!